Friday, December 4, 2009

Reality of not driving

Well, reality has hit. I'm always amazed at how life can change overnight or in an instant. The short and sweet of it all is that my epileptiologist doesn't want me driving for the next couple of months. First time that I'm not able to drive since the brain surgery. Weird.

People are telling me that I am quite calm and handling it amazingly well. I attribute it to the fact that I think I have been in disbelief. Of course, I believe the physician is overreacting and the neurodiagnostic tech in me has all kinds of "opinions". None of them count when you are the patient and not the tech. I never realized until the last few years how difficult it is to just be the patient. Experiencing life just like any other patient does with the emotions, questions, and concerns; but not over analyzing the situation, self-diagnose, or essentially play the "Doctor" role. Easier said than done, yet highly valuable in order to be able to cope and grow from whatever comes my way.

I think the brain injury experience is teaching me to relax more and face only what is right in front of me. It is not a crisis that I can't drive for awhile. I haven't fallen off the path in the journey, but the road just took a sharp, unexpected curve. A curve that apparently has something to teach me that I didn't learn the other past times that I couldn't drive. I wait expectantly to see what I am supposed to be learning from this.

I type this now as if to say that no driving is going to be a piece of cake, but when I am craving a Peppermint Mocha from Starbucks it might just be a different story. :)